Posts Tagged ‘Family’

Tina & I are foodies, sort of. Okay, not really, but do we watch a lot of cooking shows. Hell’s Kitchen, Worst Cooks in America, Restaurant Impossible, Top Chef, Chopped, Sweet Genius, Chef Wanted, Restaurant Stakeout. We also liked Ace of Cakes & Good Eats. We even have the Top Chef & Good Eats cookbooks.

We can’t really be considered foodies because we don’t have, what they call, refined pallets. She doesn’t like peas and if you put mushrooms in anything I won’t touch it with a 15 foot pole. Green beans make me gag and Tina gets sick just looking at mayonnaise.  Neither one of us are big fans of tomatoes, unless it’s a sauce or a condiment. We’re pretty simple folk. Kraft Mac n’ Cheese is a staple at our house. Sometimes I’ll fancy it up and add tuna to it. Tina does likes salmon and tilapia while I prefer my fish in stick form, easier to dip in ketchup to mask that unpleasant fish taste.

But ever since we’ve been watching these cooking shows, we’ve tried to up our game. We try out new recipes every week. Some are successful, others are not. Though I’ve found adding a butt-load of cheese will make almost anything palatable. Butt-load is a real unit of measurement in our kitchen, as well as, a heap, a glop, a handful (varies on who’s hand is cooking at the time), some, a squirt, a dollop (♪of Daisy♬), a bit, smallish, and a hunka hunka (but only in reference to cheese).

The more I watch, the more I dream of having my own restaurant. Both of us have worked in the food service industry on and off our whole lives. My first real job was at McDonald’s, then I moved up in the world to KFC. While I was in college I worked for Cinnabon (yes, I can still make them, no, I won’t tell you the secret ingredient). I’ve worked as a server and a baker, Tina’s been a waitress and a line cook. We’re smart, well-educated people, we could run our own restaurant.

We could call it TnT…

TnT Dynamite Good Food

TnT Dynamite Good Food! The marketing practically writes itself!

Or I’d like to open a bakery. We could sell breads and pastries, cookies and cakes…. I’m getting hungry just thinking about it.

We’ll call it Tim’s Big Ass Buns!

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Me and my big ass…

Can’t you just imagine walking through the mall, the scent of the fresh-baked goods wafting through the air, and a giant 6 ft ass on a lit up sign.

Like a Statue of Liberty for fat people.

“Give me your hefty, your obese, Your thick-set masses yearning to eat gluten, The bulging waistlines of your oversize pants. Send these, the rotund, corpulent to me, as I lift my gooey buns out of the fiery oven!”

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So here we are, at the end. I’m a little behind. 🙂

The weekend was busy with Easter & all.  And Illness has run rampant through the household. It ran me over yesterday.

Day 30: My favorite ice cream flavor is…

…wait for it…

Ben & Jerry’s Coffee Heath Bar Crunch.

or Dean’s Fannie May Mint Meltaway

Day 31: Self portrait & what I like best about this experience.

Like I haven’t posted enough photos already… here’s one of me and my celebrity doppelgänger Jeffery Jones.

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What did I like best?

I think overall, it gave me topics to write about and forced me to actually sit down and do it.  That’s going to be the hardest thing to do after this. Finding stuff to write about.  I’ll have to start looking at my life a little differently, find the interesting in the mundane.

The girls do give me plenty to laugh about. Yesterday the 14-year-old was complaining about a headache, I told her to put ice on her head. When I asked her later if it helped, she said yes, but the ice melted….*0_0*… um yes, that is what ice does.

For those of you that have been following me though this month of blogging, thank you. For those who just joined us,welcome, I hope to give you a reason to stay.

One last big thank you shout out to Tiffany at www.fabulousfindsbytiffany.com for the Challenge.

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My favorite time of the year. I have many “favorite” times of year.

Winter: I love Christmas songs. I love Christmas decorations. I love the soft covering of snow on the ground, the silence of a morning after a snowstorm. Before the scrape of shovels and the growl of snow blowers fill the air. But I hate shoveling and driving in it… and it’s too cold.

Summer: Love the Long days and warm nights. That’s about it. Hear in the mid-west summer has got to be one of the most miserable times of the year. It’s hot and humid and just gross. If the humidity is 100%, doesn’t that mean it’s water? I immediately start sweating when just thinking about going outside. Thank God for air conditioning.

Spring: The rain, love it. Especially thunderstorms. The smell of spring, that fresh, growing scent. Hearing the birds singing in the morning, except for that one asshole bird that sits in the tree right outside my bedroom window and starts singing at 5 am!

Fall: I love the colors of the leaves. The smell and the crunch of them underfoot. Fall also has my favorite holiday, Halloween. We love Halloween here. Maybe it’s because I was born on Halloween. As a kid I thought it was awesome, every house I went to on my birthday would give me candy. It’s not just the candy anymore, it’s the costumes, scaring the kids, and the decorations. The girls and I go all out, we love it!

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Even Seeley gets in on it…

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The main problem with this prompt? I really don’t get embarrassed very easily. I’ve been pulled over while dressed in drag. When the officer came up to the window I asked “What’s the problem big boy?” in the huskiest voice I could manage.

I don’t usually dress in drag, it was for a play. I had some pretty impressive curves back then too.

Why don’t I get embarrassed? Exhibit one:

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Yep that’s my parents.

I blame my family. They taught me to be who I am and not worry about what other people think. They taught me the importance of humor, and why you need to be able to laugh at yourself.

The closest I ever came to real embarrassment when when my daughter, who was just learning how to talk, started pointing to the clocks in the store and telling me what they were, loudly. Unfortunately she couldn’t pronounce the “L”…

I spent a while saying, loudly in response, “Yes honey those are clocks.” while giggling madly.

This was also the child that mimicked everyone. My wife and I were driving down a fairly busy side street and had to slow down because there were a bunch of teenage boys hanging out in the middle of it. She mumbled quietly “Look at those dumb asses just standing in the street.” It was warm and the windows were down. As we passed the group we hear our 2 year old, from the back seat, yell out the window, “Dumb Asses!” I was wiping away tears of laughter as we sped away.

She also spent 20 minutes singing the “F” word in the back seat over and over and over…. she was, as her sister puts it, a potty mouth. I almost drove off the road I was laughing so hard.

She grew out of it.

Mostly, she is 14 now.

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Hob·by  (Noun)

1. An activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure.

2. A migratory Old World falcon (genus Falco) with long narrow wings, catching dragonflies and birds on the wing.

I don’t have any leisure. And I certainly don’t have a falcon, although that would be awesome!

I work 6, sometimes 7, days a week. Between work and family, I’m not left with too much me time. When I do find myself with time on my hands, I usually waste it vegging in front of the TV or computer. On the rare occasion I get a bug up my ass and actually decide to do something productive, I will usually play my guitar or piano. Sometimes I will read.

Most recently I work on this blog.

I used to draw and paint. The last thing I painted was the girls bedrooms. The last thing I drew, for pleasure, was my self-portrait back on day 1 of the challenge.

If I’ve gained anything from the 31 Day Blog Challenge, besides you wonderful followers, it’s to do something for yourself, something you enjoy, everyday. Even if it’s for 15 minutes.

It’s getting my juices flowing. It’s making me itch to draw more, to paint something, to write more, to create. To grab my camera and photograph everything, like I used to.

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Centennial Bridge – © 1997

If the snow stops… I’m going out tomorrow, camera in hand and we’ll see if I still got it.

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